Indissoluble Marriage

Homily for the Twenty-Seventh Sunday in Ordinary Time

By Deacon Thomas Stephenson

October 04, 2015

For about the past 45 years, we have been using a three year cycle for the Sunday readings. So, on this 27th Sunday of Ordinary Time, in Year B of the cycle, we hear the same First Reading, Psalm, Second Reading, and Gospel, that we heard in 2012, and 2009, and 2006, and so on. The readings are not chosen to relate to current events; they were determined long ago. Of course, by the very nature of scripture the readings will always be relevant to our lives, and the world at large. And yet, today’s readings are especially significant considering what is about to happen in the Vatican, as the Synod on the Family begins today, and will run for the next three weeks. The Synod has many topics to consider, and these readings bear on a few of them, one in particular which has received much of the attention leading up to the Synod – the situation of civilly divorced and remarried couples. We need to remember that in these passages from Scripture, God reveals to us His teachings on marriage for our benefit and our salvation, and that these teachings are not only currently relevant, but have been relevant in the past and will continue to be in the future. The specifics may change, but the challenges and temptations have existed for millennia.

When the Pharisees ask Jesus about the lawfulness of divorce, Jesus knows that, as is so often the case, they are not looking for the truth; they want to catch Jesus in a trap. But He uses this instead as a way to give them, and us, the truth. He prompts them to tell Him what Moses commanded – see, the issue of divorce was present even at the time of Moses, and long before – and then Jesus replies that it was “because of the hardness of your hearts that he wrote this commandment for you”. It has been suggested that this may not have been for simple stubbornness; it could also have been a way of saving the lives of some women. In the culture at Moses’ time, and in some cultures even today, without divorce, the husbands may have arranged for the death of their wives. That hardness of heart is manifested in other ways, too, in the rejection of God’s teachings and His plan for marriage. In repeating the words from Genesis, Jesus could not be much clearer: “…a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let no one separate.” The disciples seem to still not be too sure about this, and Jesus reiterates His support for marriage, and denunciation of divorce, indicating that those who divorce and remarry commit adultery. Since in God’s eyes the spouses are still married, any other intimate relationship they enter into is adulterous.

However, we know that many people, for various reasons, are in marriages where one or both spouses were previously married to others. There are tremendous pressures on married couples these days, battered and buffeted by all sorts of influences that test our commitment. Those of us who have been married a long time recognize how much work, dedication, and love are required to keep it going. Not just a romantic type of love, but a deep down in the heart and in the soul love. A love, not just for each other, but a love of God that is reflected in their love for each other. But sometimes, one or both spouses come up short, and the marriage irreparably breaks down. If that happens, before beginning any other relationship, the marriage tribunal should be contacted to determine the validity of the existing marriage.

Some of you may recall that before I married Faith, I was married before. I won’t repeat the details, but after the divorce, I went through what is commonly called the annulment process and my first marriage was declared invalid. The Church does not grant an annulment; it basically investigates and, based on evidence at the time of the marriage, finds that the marriage was valid or invalid. It cannot and will not dissolve a valid marriage, and it presumes all marriages are valid until proven otherwise. As Pope Francis said during his flight back to Rome last week, “Either it wasn’t a marriage, and this is nullity — it didn’t exist. And if it did, it’s indissoluble. This is clear.”

I encourage anyone who may be in a situation of being civilly divorced, or knows someone in that situation, to please contact the Marriage Tribunal. This is not something to fear. It is a process which is intended to bring healing and reconciliation. It is not about opening old wounds, but helping to finally close them. It also helps those involved to reconcile to God and His Church, and to participate fully in the sacraments. Pope Francis has also recently made the process a little easier, and quicker. It is not easier to have a marriage declared invalid, but it is easier to go through the process. And although the Church does provide this for us, the preference is always for the spouses to work out their differences and stay married in the first place.

God’s plan for marriage, as set out in today’s readings and revealed elsewhere in scripture, does not include divorce and remarriage. However, we need to have compassion for those who are in problematic relationships. Regardless of someone’s situation, they are welcome in our church – as a matter of fact, as Catholics, they are still required to follow the precepts of the Church, including attending Sunday Mass along with the rest of us sinners, even if they are not in the state of grace necessary to receive the sacraments.

God loves us and wants us to be happy. Our true happiness comes in following His commandments, adhering to His teachings. Jesus spoke about divorce in the Gospel, but he also spoke about the beauty of a man and a woman coming together, two people becoming one flesh. We, too, should recognize the beauty of God’s plan, and do everything we can to avoid, and help others avoid, ever even considering the possibility of divorce.

We will hear many reports from the Synod over the next few weeks. As this unfolds, we as Catholics may be asked questions about these issues. This may present us with opportunities for evangelisation, and we should be prepared as much as possible. We should also keep in mind that reports in the media are almost guaranteed to be inaccurate at best, and sometimes intentionally misleading. Let’s face it, the Church is not popular for many of its teachings. And it appears that one of the reasons for such widespread interest in the Synod is the hope that the Church will bow to the spirit of the times.

It would not be possible to condense everything about the matters addressed in today’s readings, and about God’s plan for marriage and the family, in a homily. There is so much more to say. Our understanding should not end here. All of us should become familiar with what Jesus’ teachings are, for our own sake and the sake of our families and others we encounter. We cannot help others if we are not well prepared ourselves. We may be challenged for our beliefs, but we must pass along what we know in truth and love. Marriage as the Church understands it, based on Divine Revelation, is a marvelous gift. Let us continue to pray for renewed strength for all marriages and families, that they may grow closer to each other and closer to God.